1 Peter - Purity and Reverence


Question of the day:  What is something that you are thankful for today and or what is something that is heavy on your heart?

Today we continue in 1 Peter.  We are starting chapter 3. 

READ: 1 Peter 3:1-7

1 Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, 2 when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. 3 your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. 4 Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. 5 For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, 6 like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear. 7 Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.
Today we will take this verse by verse. 
1. "in the same way"
Right off the bat we see that this is not a passage to be looked at on it's own.  This is connected to what he has just written.  So what is he referring to? 
   "to your own husbands" Why is this important to note?
    "so that..." This refers back to last week doesn't it?  
2.    "when they see the purity and reverence of your lives."  
Just this past week I was having a conversation with some girlfriends about this.  Not this passage per se  but we were talking about our husbands, and how just the way we think of them, and also the way we treat them makes a huge difference.  Look, you could say what he is saying here is that you can get more flies with honey.  Or whatever that saying is.  We have an opportunity to love our husbands in a way that helps them better understand the nature of Christ.  We as Christians are to do the same with everyone.  It is because of what he did for us that we live and interact differently that anyone else.  It is a life filled with Christ that has an impact! It is a life that reflects Christ that can soften hearts and be an instrument in winning souls.  
3.  "Your beauty should not come from..."  Ok, I have to be honest here.  This passage I believe has been miss used way too much.  We spend way to much time arguing and focusing on the very thing that here Peter is saying should not be the focus.  Adornment is not where our beauty comes from... We focus on verse 3 and not on verse 4.  So we will move on... I'm not ignoring this.  Just be patient.
4. "Rather it should be that of your inner self." Put this together with verse 1 and even chapter 2 and what he is saying is....
This is my version...
"Ladies, you have an incredible opportunity to share the love of Jesus with you husbands who don't know him, by loving him the way Christ has loved you.  Your Christlike love for him is also where your true glorious beauty comes from.  There is nothing more beautiful than a woman whose inner beauty radiates.  You don't need the perfect hair, clothes, or jewelry.  It is your heart for Christ put into action in loving your husband that will make you beautiful, desirable, and yes even sexy!"

It is so important for us to get this right.  Look, if you don't wear jewelry, or fine clothes or elaborate hairstyles, that is fine and good, if you do, that is fine and good.  IF YOUR INSIDES ARE BEAUTIFUL!  Look you can not wear jewelry, fine clothes and elaborate hairstyles and miss this whole point!  There are many women who in a yearning desire to serve God only wear very simple clothes but miss verse 4.  Verse 3 without 4 is still terrible.  I don't read that you shouldn't wear these things but that it is NOT from these things that you have beauty.  Beauty is an inner beauty.  True beauty is a woman who glows with the fruits of the spirit... God's love.  Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness,..... and so on. 

We have focused on verse 3 because it is what we see and what we can control in others, but the beauty of this passage, is that it is so much more than those three things.  My beauty doesn't come from a perfect body, or a glorious black hair, or a face without wrinkles, or any of that.  Oh I am BEAUTIFUL!!!!! I am beautiful because God made me that way.  I am beautiful because he is doing a work in my life!  I am beautiful because everyday I am asking him to continue the work of healing my heart, and that THAT shows, that glows! Brighter than anything I can do to make my outside beautiful.  All the plastic surgery in the world, all the fine clothes, all the jewelry, all the hair color and fancy cuts, all the planks, all the right food, all the good nights of sleep, ALL OF IT CAN'T COVER a BROKEN, ANGRY, HURTING, HEART!

5 & 6 In this passage he is giving them again the sense of community and connection.  Letting them know they are part of this new family, and new heritage.  That to let their beauty be a woman who puts her hope in the Lord, is what their "NEW" family did.

I love that he uses Sara as an example.  Because what we know about her is that she was stunning!  So beautiful that Kings desired her! She had to have been physically gorgeous.  So this is not about NOT being beautiful!  It is about letting your inner beauty be so bright, that it outshines everything else!

7. "in the same way" Right off the bat we see that this verse also does not stand on it's own, but must be connected to all that has been written by Peter before.  As wives treat their husbands makes all the difference, so how husbands treat their wives, makes all the difference!

"be considerate and treat them with respect as the weaker partner " I am sure most of us women are bristling just a bit... OR A LOT... at the "weaker partner".  I DID!  So I went to looking it up and trying to better understand what he is saying...

So I looked at it in different versions....

KJV
Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.
RSV

Likewise you husbands, live considerately with your wives, bestowing honor on the woman as the weaker sex, since you are joint heirs of the grace of life, in order that your prayers may not be hindered. 
ESV 
Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.
First let's look at the word weaker...  This word is used a lot when talking about Christ and us without Christ.  

Romans 5:6.  You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly.
1 Cor. 4:10 We are fools for Christ, but you are so wise in Christ! We are weak, but you are strong! You are honored, we are dishonored! 

I personally think that he could also be referring here to wives who are not Christians as he was above speaking about husbands who did not know Christ. However even if he isn't, even if it is just in general about wives, it is still a beautiful thing and not a demeaning one.  Stay with me for a moment.

Let's focus now on "partner or vessel"

This word first is also used in the bible when talking about men, in fact a man of quality a chosen instrument. 

  1. a vessel
  2. an implement
    1. in the plural
      1. household utensils, domestic gear
      2. the tackle and armament of vessels, used specifically of sails and ropes
  3. metaph.
    1. a man of quality, a chosen instrument
    2. in a bad sense, an assistant in accomplishing an evil deed
      "Vessel" was a common Greek metaphor for "body" since Greeks thought of souls living temporarily in bodies.

All of this is interesting and perhaps less offensive to my 21st Century ears. 

Look at it this way. I want to talk in a language most of you men will understand.   I want you to think about your tool box.  This past week Chris and I were using a level to make sure our dining hutch was level since it sits on an uneven floor. A level is vitally important to building a house.  There is NO way a builder or a brick mason would ever build a house without a level.  However, if they use the level for hammering in a nail, it will destroy it.  Husbands, you have a wife who is your partner, with beautiful and irreplaceable traits.  Treat her with care! Take care of her.  You can't build a home without her so treat her well! 

Another way to look at this is she is a Chef's knife.  A chef treats his knife with care.  They wrap them up every night.  They only use them to cut food, not anything else.  They don't even use their knife to cut chocolate because it will dull the blade.  A chef's knife is treasured and passed down for generations when they have been taken care of.  That is what Peter is telling husbands to do.  Treat your wife with care, show her honor, treasure her, because she is your partner!

We end this lesson with the last phrase....

as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.

What does this mean?  Why does this impact your prayers? Hmm.  

Husbands, your wives are in this life with you. They are also heirs with you in this life God has given you.  Salvation is not just yours, it is also theirs and together, wow together there is beautiful strength.  I'm not sure exactly what Peter meant by, "so that nothing will hinder your prayers." What I do know is that a couple together praying is wonderful, powerful, beautiful.  What I do know is that a man living a life of honor, loving his wife with honor, is a man surrendered to God, and a man with a humble heart who is also a servant to his wife.  

I realize I spent too much time on "weaker vessel" so I want to balance this out a bit.  What God is calling the man to do is...

Be considerate, and treat your wife with respect.  Remember she is your partner in this walk, also a child of God, so treat her as your partner!  If she is a believer or not love her as a child of God.

With both chapter 2 and chapter 3 Peter is telling them to treat each other well, because of what God has done for you.  How we treat one another is not because of how we treat one another.  We don't treat a person based on how much they deserve it and on how they have treated us, but we are kind because Christ is kind.  We are loving because Christ was loving.  So I love Chris because Christ loved me not because Chris loves me!



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