The Gospel According to Matthew
Matthew 19: 1-12
Good morning Happy Sabbath and Merry Christmas!!!!! We get to talk about the big D. DIVORCE! Well merry Christmas to us all! Seriously. When I realized that was today's topic I considered skipping it. Nothing like a good discussion on divorce to uplift us during the holidays!
In all seriousness, this is either this is a very sensitive subject for you because it has impacted your life in a very real way, or if you are one of the few that divorce has not been a part of your story then this may seem like, "what is the big deal." This is a subject that is tied up in deep emotions and hurt. Maybe anger, resentment, and distrust. This may make some of us defensive, or insensitive. It all depends on our own personal experience.
As we delve into this passage I ask that we remember each of our experience colors the lenses we see through as we read. I ask that in class we LISTEN. Listen to each other and try to have a new understanding not only of this passage but also of one another.
Question of the day: Going back to your childhood.... what brought you joy?
I will answer. When I was a young girl, I loved riding my horse, finding a place to let him graze and then I would lay down on the grass and watch the clouds. While lying there I would pray and talk to God. We had some great conversations! Pure JOY!
READ: Matthew 19: 1-12
Divorce
19 When Jesus had finished saying these things, he left Galilee and went into the region of Judea to the other side of the Jordan. 2 Large crowds followed him, and he healed them there.
3 Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?”
4 “Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’[a] 5 and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’[b]? 6 So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”
7 “Why then,” they asked, “did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?”
8 Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. 9 I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.”
10 The disciples said to him, “If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry.”
11 Jesus replied, “Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given. 12 For there are eunuchs who were born that way, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by others—and there are those who choose to live like eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it.”
There are crowds still following him and Jesus is still healing them. The Pharisees are still upset at Jesus. It is interesting that the disciples find it important to let us know that they are trying to trick Jesus. At the time there were two different groups who believed very differently about divorce. One group, the more conservative one believed that only adultery were grounds for a husband to divorce his wife. The other group a more liberal group, believed that almost anything, even a woman cooking a meal wrong could be divorced. So the Pharisees were trying to trick him.
When Jesus answers he does so in the traditional way. By quoting scripture. Instead of talking about divorce he talks about marriage.
Instead of talking about divorce he talks about marriage.... hmmm.
LIFE APPLICATION: What are some topics that we might discuss or be concerned about, where we need to study the opposite topic instead? Confused?
Stress/ Peace
Bondage/ Freedom
Busyness/ Balance
Drama in Relationships/ Support in Relationships
Broken/ Whole
Disorganized/ organization
What are you struggling with? Maybe you are thinking about divorce. Maybe you are stressed out. Maybe you are....
How can you start flipping your difficulty upside down?
When Jesus did this he helped to identify what was vitally important. He put the focus back on something that God had established.
What part of marriage is highlighted here? Clue it is the part that is repeated.
There is no doubt that one of the most interesting parts of marriage is the concept that when you marry the two become one. This is not just talking about the sexual union. There is to be an intimacy with each other that is with no one else. This oneness is also seen in the Trinity. In no other place is this concept other than marriage and in the Trinity. Is this important? Well I firmly believe that with God, husband and wife, you can have an earthly example of how the trinity is three distinct individuals and yet they are one. It is a beautiful example for us all. The cooperation, love, understanding, honoring of different roles, and so much more that in this sinful world is rarely seen and often considered nothing more than a fable, and yet in a marriage where God is the center and husband and wife, it is possible to not only see these but to experience the beauty of this oneness. However it takes a heart that is not hardened for sure!
Oneness. What can you do today to promote oneness in your marriage?
If you are not married, what is something you can do to promote oneness in your relationships within the church?
Oneness, is a huge part of what God intended for us.
Oneness, is in the trinity.
Oneness, his plan in marriage.
Oneness, his command to the church.
Oneness.
Hmmmm.
So then the Pharisees obviously knew this passage as well, and so they continue to try to trick him...
Jesus answered the more conservative way... and then kicked them in the gut. What part of this passage do you think they didn't like hearing?
Imagine if husbands could divorce their wives for little petty things and then go off and find themselves someone that they just like a little better? They were in a way getting a free ride. They could divorce find someone new and be within the law.
So once again Jesus took His requirements one step further. He asks for more. Doesn't want us just going by the letter of the law, but he wants our hearts.
The disciples realize how difficult this requirement is and suggest that then maybe we just shouldn't marry. That speaks to how crazy this was for them.
What is Jesus asking of you that you think is just too much?
I don't want us to turn this into a debate about all the "reasons" we find divorce acceptable. If you are considering divorce or already have divorced than that is something you can work out with God.
If not divorce, what have you been doing or wanting to do that you know is outside of his will?
When we live outside His will what relationship does it hurt?
He will never leave us or forsake us, but can we damage things?
Back to oneness. What can you do to have oneness with Christ?
What can you do to have oneness with your spouse?
Make list and start working on them.
Who am I?
I am married. I am one with Chris. Because of who Jesus is, because of his remarkable forgiveness of me, I can focus on healing, love, forgiveness, joy, peace, and oneness with my man.
How?
Continue to surrender myself to my Savior.
Pray for my husband, (not in a... Lord please fix him kind of way.... but Lord bless him.... give me the wisdom to know how to love him today!)
Keep my focus on the transformative fix given to us by Jesus instead of the struggle.
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